summersgate: (eggshells)
Good morning Christmas Eve Day. It'll be a busy day today. First we will go over and watch the grandkids open the presents they are getting from their dad, then Johnny and I will go shopping, there will be foods that need fixed and cleaning to be done, dinner for the family tonight and present opening again. Then the grandkids will be heading off to their mom's house for the rest of the weekend. Actual Christmas Day (Sunday) will be rather dull I imagine. Holiday weekends can get me all mixed up as to what day it is. This year it might be good with the holidays happening on Saturday and Sunday.

Today's drawing. Taken from a small detail in the "#49 Honors" card in the Dream Inspiration deck. Lots of other confusing stuff going on in the image but these 2 hands clasped in trust seemed to be a good thing to concentrate on.

I got some beautiful yarn yesterday called Red Heart Unforgettable in the Polo color:
I want to make a granny square blanket with it and give it to Chloe as a gift. The colors remind me of her. As the yarn works up it is supposed to be self color changing and I won't have to stop to tie in new colors all the time like regular granny squares. Then after I see how that goes I'd like to make a blanket for Johnny in the Dragonfly color:
dragonfly unforgettable yarn
That should keep me busy for quite a while in the coming year.


Dec. 19th, 2016 07:01 am
summersgate: (eggshells)
She reaches too late - the rose is dead now. That is her sorrow - she is always too late. Even though she is the goddess of monthly time it doesn't help her with the minutes or days. But she puts on a good face anyway.

A new week. The week before Christmas. People ask, are you ready for Christmas? No. Yes. No. Do I have to be ready?

That's why I don't like holidays much. Time is supposed to arbitrarily stop and everything turns itself over to the holiday. Foods are supposed to be prepared and eaten. The mail doesn't come. Decorations are supposed to come out and then go back away again. I'm supposed to be "ready". And if I'm not ready?

Yesterday I dismantled the flower centerpiece that we were given for Thanksgiving. I had let it dry out to see which flowers could be salvaged. There were intense blue ones with sharp spurs around the flower's base that pricked if you held them the wrong way. There were roses whose petals had all turned brown except for a beautiful pinkish red rim around the top edge of each. There were big daisy-ish flowers with yellow petals that were easy to pluck out. I put the flower petals in baggies. Someday I might use them to make handmade paper.

I switched over last night to making colorful granny square cotton dishcloths. It is amazing how much faster they work up than the regular knit or crochet ones I was making before. I made 3 in one evening - compared to just one a night before.


These are gifts - part of getting ready for Christmas. Or just something I want to do - I might give them away all year long too. Have a pile I keep near the door that I can reach into and give one or two away whenever I feel like it. Dishcloths are disposable - they are always getting old and worn out. Dave does that with flashlights. He buys bunches of them cheap from ebay and then he'll give them away to people just out of the blue. I like that idea better than having to "get ready for Christmas".


Nov. 25th, 2016 09:25 am
summersgate: (eggshells)
Rest - inspired by a Soul Cards card this morning. Today will be a good day for rest. I woke up with a very stiff back this morning. My feet and back were hurting last night too. Not used to all the stooping and cleaning and standing on my feet I did yesterday. But I feel our birthday party/thanksgiving dinner was a success and I'm glad I got the house spruced up as much as I did. It had fallen into a pretty dusty grimy state of disrepair. Hazel helped a lot. Dusted things and helped me cut up celery and apples and pare potatoes. Reminded me of when I was young and helping my mother in the kitchen. I definitely helped her a lot on the holidays but also helped her most afternoons just with little things like preparing vegetables, cleaning carrots, shucking peas or corn and paring potatoes for dinner. At the time I felt like it was interrupting my *busy* life of sitting in my room reading but I'm glad now I learned how to cook from her this way.

Andy was VERY good with all the company we had here last night. He was a little too excited when Chloe and Mike arrived first but we held him in one spot away from them till he got calmer and then let him go to greet them. He wanted to jump up a bit but soon got over it. I'm glad they were the first arrivals cause they are used to dogs and Chloe has special charming abilities with most animals. From then on as other people arrived he became calmer and calmer with each new arrival. David Z brought his little sister Lori who has Down's Syndrome. She walks with a walker and Andy was very respectful of her - though after about an hour and she didn't eat the cheese on the plate she had set on a low table beside her (the usual table that Andy is allowed to sit on and look out the window) he gently reached over and ate the cheese. Lori and I looked at each other and laughed. Hazel brought out the laser light after dinner and Andy chased it for us. Very funny.

So - back to my usual life today.
summersgate: (eggshells)
10 of Swords - Inner Child tarot.

Usually the 10 of Swords is a very unpleasant card with a dead person laying there, his blood all drained out and 10 swords plunged in his back. The end - hit bottom. Inner Child tarot is not so bleak. As a compulsive overeater (on a day dedicated to overeating and excess) I like the image of the endless cycle (serpent eating it's tail) being held in place with a circle of swords, like a fence around it. One of my favorite sayings is that I need to keep a fence around my food. And just before I drew the card I was thinking about another saying I had recently heard, "Chew More, Eat Less". So the card really seems to be meaningful in relationship to food today. I have a tendency to put too much food on my plate and then feel like I have to do my duty and clean my plate - no matter how full I already am. I like having this morning meditation time to get centered for my day and make plans on how to handle it.

Still lots of cleaning and cooking to be done today before company gets here. That is not exciting to me but I guess I can dedicate one day of my life to being a normal domestic person. I was remembering last night as I was in the kitchen baking a cake that in high school I won the Betty Crocker Homemaking Award - something they gave out back in the 60's. Yes, I know well how to cook and clean - that doesn't mean I like to do it.

I am thankful for:
Family. All good people who I enjoy being with.
My good friends who I trust to listen to me and really hear me.
Andy - he certainly is entertaining. Last night Hazel brought over the laser light cat toy and Andy chased the dot of red light all around the living room like a nut. When it was on the ceiling he even tried to jump up and get it there.
Milo and Skye - both good for quiet kitty loving.
My health - which is good and I am strong enough to do what I want to do. I guess I am lucky that I don't want to do anything I can't.


Nov. 21st, 2016 07:11 am
summersgate: (eggshells)
Nov 21, 2016 - a fresh new day to write in.

I changed over to burning birthday candles for my morning meditation - they burn for around 15 minutes so I am dedicated to staying at my writing table for periods at least that length. Today I burned 2. Lighting a candle keeps me at the table cause I wouldn't want to leave a lit candle unattended with Skye around. My problem is that I get so easily distracted. I need a block of time where I stay focused and this seems to be working.

We are having 13 people here for Thanksgiving. So I ended up writing about what I need to clean and what I need to cook. Hazel does my usual cleaning (sweeping, vacuuming and the bathroom) but there is some deep dusting, redding up and removal of junk that needs to take place that really only I can do. There are 3 vegans that need to be accommodated when I plan the food so no cream sauces, milk or cheese in a good part of the foods. Dave will make the turkey and stuffing for the meat eaters and I usually make the vegetables anyway so that isn't much different from past years. Three bean salad, sugar carrots, acorn squash, mashed potatoes, steamed fresh broccoli and waldorf salad.

What I really want to do right now is work on jewelry - not clean or cook. I hope I can fit some of that in in the next few days too.

The snow is holding on - still a white world out there but the roads are clear.
summersgate: (eggshells)
I've been a cooking fool today - something I don't do that often but now that I am trying to make more vegan meals I find I have to make things from scratch. I miss cheese to add the protein to meals and have to find it in other ways now. This morning I made a big pot of 15 bean soup, baked cornbread and chopped up pico de gallo to go with the hummus that has become a staple around here. 10 more minutes and time for lunch...

I really don't like focusing on food that much - I hope this interest in it declines and just becomes a part of my life eventually.

Though, I do enjoy being in the center of home life that is the kitchen for a change.

Watching Green Acres in the background at the moment. So silly but I like silly sometimes. I finished The Handmaid's Tale late last night and am started in the second book in Gerald Durrell's story of his childhood on the Greek island of Corfu - Birds, Beasts, and Relatives. I really loved the first one, My Family and Other Animals.

After lunch there will a walk or hike or bike ride with Dave coming up. Or maybe a nap first.

dad's day+

Jun. 19th, 2016 09:15 am
summersgate: (summer)

I'm not much of a one for holidays but I did have a thought of Dad when I woke up this morning. I was remembering when my dog Queenie had been hit on the road and killed one summer - I was 15 years old - it was around July 4th. She had gone out in the night to go to the bathroom and not come back. Which was odd for her - she never wandered far from the house. I thought I had trained her well to not go past a certain line in the front yard. But there were fireworks going on and she was deathly afraid of thunder so maybe she got scared and confused that night. I looked and looked for her all around the yard and called and called but then finally there was nothing to do but go to bed. The next morning I got up and Dad told me that he had found Queenie and buried her. I was heartbroken. But this was also something that put a little wall between my dad and me. The fact that we didn't do this thing together. He left me out of the burying of my own dog. I logically know that Queenie must have looked very bad and he just didn't want me to see such a horrible thing. But this morning I had an insight into Dad - he also didn't want to see my grieving - didn't want to add another grief on top of his grief filled life. It was a protection for him too. When you are grieving alone you can encapsulate your grief better and isolate it - attempt to ignore it. He was still grieving the loss of the health of his son. He was hiding from me and from his own feelings. He was a very tender and sentimental man. Writing that makes me cry now - sad for you Dad. Miss you.


This is a big time for me in that some years on these dates there are 4 holidays in a row. Many years Father's Day falls on the 19th, then there is my birthday on the 20th, on the 21st is Dave's and my anniversary and then on the 22nd we celebrate Roswell's birthday. This year Dave and I will be married 30 years. We were late in finding each other - we didn't meet till I was 30. I want to do something special on Tuesday night. What I'm hoping to do is go on a canoe ride with him. It was something we did a lot when we were first dating.

So today - another beautiful day. Yesterday Dave took Andy and spent time with his brothers and their dogs at the Clarion River while I had time alone here at home. I puttered around - played with the clay in the basement and with my jewelry stuff in my room and spent time in the tent listening to birds and squirrels and chipmunks. After it got dark I went back out again with a flashlight and read till Dave and Andy got home around 11. Andy was so tired he came in and jumped on a cot and went right to sleep - no tearing around the tent like he usually does. Dave and I lay on the cots and watched fireflies. There were 2 above us - one under the rain-fly that was bright to us and one on top of the rain-fly which was a dull light. They were trying to get to each other but couldn't find their way. Bright flash, dull flash. bright flash, dull flash in new places each time, circling each other.
summersgate: (eggshells)
My eyes have been running lately - dripping. It happens now and then. Spontaneously crying. I can barely see the words on the computer screen right now. I used to think it was a psychic thing - so many years of life had filled me with a backlog of tears that needed shed so now they are just oozing out. But then I googled it and it seems that "dry eyes" can be the culprit. So I got some eye drops. I hate putting things in eyes and it is very hard to keep my eyes open and drop something in them. But I found that if I keep the eye drops in the inside pocket of the quilted vest that I wear most all the time then they get warm enough so it isn't such a shock when the drops hit my eyes. Suitably warm.

Happy new year. Happy new day. Happy new season (I don't really count winter as arriving till January).
The fridge is so full right now - opening it is like opening a door to a wall of food.
No resolutions - but some hopes. A hope to be more creative - with my writing and my art.
Tiny snow flakes falling outside. A gray flat sky.
Skye perched in the window watching the neighbor's cat walk by outside. By their markings they could be twins except that Skye is a fat-cat and outdoor cat is bone thin.
Dave will be plumbing next door today - I will be be fashioning the first day of my new year here.
summersgate: (self portrait a day)
44. Do you hold any convictions that you would be willing to die for?

Die for? Sounds very serious. I would not die for any organized religion or political system, or country. I might be willing to die to try to save someone else from death.

A very busy day today - cleaning house - making food - visiting with family. Everyone just left. Here's my self portrait for today - taken by Chloe:


We've been watching the Fargo series - first season - the ones with Billy Bob Thornton. Looking forward to tonight's episode...
summersgate: (self portrait a day)
I opened and lit a new candle on my candle shelf today. It's called Ho Ho Ho - smells like bayberry and balsam I think - it's my favorite. This area is one place I didn't dust and clean for the holiday yesterday - everything still covered in dust and old candle soot. That mirror is very old and belonged to my maternal grandmother I do believe. Even if it was clean it would still be murky but I like it that way. On the far right I hung a sweet little glass candle ornament that my sister [ profile] earthmother45 gave me.

17. What was the most recent compliment you’ve received and savoured?

Funny - but my mind wards off compliments and won't accept them - something in me wants to refute any compliments and block them from my mind. Though I do receive them here on LJ and FB when I put jewelry up, so there is that. I enjoy hearing that people like it. Those might be the most recent compliments I have let in.
summersgate: (eggshells)
16. Are you more likely to avoid conflict or engage it head-on?

Most the time I avoid conflict - especially if I won't be able to change things or change people anyway by engaging with them. I am willing to state my beliefs if I think I can be heard - but I'm not going to even bother if I know the other person is set. I think a well placed positive remark can change things eventually - maybe not at the moment it is made, but it can be one more drop in the bucket to fill it later I hope. Though - if it's conflict with Dave about something I want for the house I will not give up - it's a joke between us - he's going to keep hearing about it till I get my way - not every day or all the time but the subject will come up again.

On with my day...
Later today will be our thanksgiving dinner - so I have some foods I still need to make. Dave is making the turkey. We will have 13 people here - even some guests from outside the family - which will be different for us. I have a bit more cleaning to do too - forgot to get the cobwebs down from the ceiling! Something that hasn't been done in over 2 years so there are a lot.
summersgate: (eggshells)
"Into the Light" pendant - sterling, abalone and brass dragonflies Listing HERE

Happy Thanksgiving to all. My day won't be much different from a regular day today though. We are having our family dinner tomorrow instead of today. I will do some baking later. And house cleaning too.

The question of the day:
15. Which animals scare you the most? Why?

I am finding that I am getting more wary of dogs as I get older. I don't know if I would say that I am scared when I see one but I don't wholeheartedly trust them like I used to. I have heard of too many senseless dog attacks and witnessed some too. I've had some dogs of my own that couldn't be trusted. I don't think I have an actual "fear" of any animals. I get an adrenaline rush when I unexpectedly see a spider or a snake but it passes quickly. I think that thrill is built into humans.
summersgate: (eggshells)
"Circling" pendant - sterling with brass bees and pressed glass tessera cabochon Listing HERE

Another pendant that is more summery in nature. Oh well...

Raining today. Veteran's Day - no school, no mail. Probably just stay home and work in my room, which is okay by me.

turtle #6

Sep. 7th, 2015 01:02 pm
summersgate: (eggshells)
"Vigilance" pendant - sterling and taxidermy reptile eye Listing HERE

It's shaping up to be another very hot day but at least we got out early and did something. We parked at Belmar and Sebby and I biked 4 miles (8 miles total) while Johnny and Alison walked 1 mile (2 miles total) with Rossy skateboarding. Sebby and I saw a huge black snake coiled up ready to strike as we whizzed by it on the trail. Just before we got to it another biker going the other way must have scared it so it coiled. I didn't even know what it was till we got right up to it - you don't usually see a "mound" of snake.

Chloe and Mike will be here soon. I'm hoping to get them into the basement with me and maybe I can figure out some more things to put in a pile for them to take when they get their house finished - then I can start to assign other things to get rid of.
summersgate: (summer)
trying to grow morning glories - not doing so well - maybe it was all the wet weather

Foggy morning. Dave threw another log on the fire this morning to keep it going. I cleaned up the back porch a bit more yesterday so we could have Jules and the boys over for a barbecue. It's not totally cleaned up yet but it's at least a lot more pleasant. I shuffled the junk into out-of-the-way places. It was really nice to sit out there this morning - something I have been looking forward to doing this summer but hadn't got around to. The wood smoke is like incense to me. We have 2 gourd birdhouses hanging on the porch poles. Wrens raised a set of babies in the one and now they are raising a second brood in the other. I enjoyed hearing the birds singing. Last night after Jules and the boys left Dave and I sat and watched the fire into the night - listening to see if we could hear when Franklin's fireworks started. I felt sure we would be able to hear it cause it is only 5 miles away but I couldn't. We walked into the front yard to see if we could hear better there and saw that the neighbors across the road had a fire too. Dave being the friendly person that he is wanted to walk over and say hi. Their daughter has cancer and it was sad to see her in pain now and a lot thinner than she was. She has had 3 operations and they have taken out 3/4 of her intestines. Really brought it home to me how precarious and precious life is.

Looks like it is going to be a super beautiful day today. Plans: hopefully a bike ride at some point (another try for Indian God Rock?) and later get out the tent and set it up down back by the creek - maybe we can sleep out tonight with the grandboys. An easy camping experience.
summersgate: (eggshells)

The good thing about this is really there is just the angel, 7 blown glass balls, 5 pieces of ribbon and 2 candle holders to put away. A 5 minute job - I just need to get on with it and do it. I will probably leave Rossy's paper poinsettia up till it falls down on it's own.
summersgate: (eggshells)
purple last Friday

stabilized now

During the night I caught my injured finger in the bedclothes and felt it snap a little - an incredible pain. Then I had a terrible time falling back asleep. So I finally called my doctor this morning and he got me an order for an xray this afternoon. My finger is broken - so I feel vindicated that I'm not just a whiny wimp. I have an appointment to see an orthopedic doctor on Friday and till then I'm supposed to have it taped to an adjoining finger. Johnny did a great job of trussing it up for me. Feels so much better now that it is stabilized. I wish I had done that to start with but I was hoping it wasn't broken.

New Year's Eve plans: The grandboys are at their aunt's house for a party. Dave, Johnny and I will have dinner (cod fish poached in milk with buttered noodles on the side), drink wine and watch lots of movies. I will have to drink coffee too though if I want to stay up late. We picked up some DVD's on the way home from the hospital. My choices were 33 Postcards, Ladies in Lavender and Last Chance Harvey. Johnny picked out Maze Runner (which they are watching right now). Tomorrow the guys will be eating sauerkraut, pork roast and kielbasa.
summersgate: (eggshells)
A downy woodpecker outside my window just now.

I haven't had many visitors to the new suet feeder. The first day I had a few birds (chickadees and tufted titmice) trying it out and was thinking that it was going to be a big hit but after that not very many partakers. So I was excited to see this little downy woodpecker just now.

I'm not much of a holiday person. Even for Thanksgiving - I feel like we should be thankful every day anyway. We are only going to have a very small gathering here today - Dave and me, Jules and Chloe. The grandboys are gone for the weekend, Johnny is at his girlfriend's for the weekend and Chloe's boyfriend has to work. That's ok that it will be small - whatever is, is what it is! Less expectations.

Yesterday Dave and I were going to work on Chloe and Mike's house - I was going to help Dave pull electrical wires. But he got AFib during the night and we ended up going to the emergency room instead. While there his heart went back to normal rhythm so then we just came home again. I wish they could get this under control. The meds they are giving him aren't working yet evidently. They said to increase the meds and to visit his doctor next week to discuss it.

To do today:
Clean up kitchen so Dave can make the turkey.
Vacuum and sweep the house.
Clean the bathroom.
Make foods - boil potatoes and make mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, pineapple yogurt desert, heat up the Harvard beets. Dave has already made 2 pies and I made 3 bean salad last night.

Milo has not been feeling well - throwing up and diarrhea. He was hiding under a chair in the basement yesterday. He talked to me when I "talked" to him but he didn't want to come out so I just left him alone. The last time Milo got sick (and was hiding in the basement) he had crystals in his bladder and it cost $500 to set him right again. But today he is back up here on my bed in my workroom where he belongs, thank goodness. I already feed him a diet that is supposed to be good for urinary health so I don't know what was wrong yesterday. Hopefully just a hairball.

Milo sleeping on the bed behind me just now. I love the way he sleeps so often with his head tucked in upside down.

So I am thankful. Thankful that Milo is better. Thankful that Dave is doing good today. Thankful that we do have doctors and nurses and modern medicine. Thankful that the grandboys have a mom who loves them that they can be with on holidays. Thankful that Johnny has a girl he loves who loves him. Thankful that I will get to have a meal with 2 of my kids tonight.
summersgate: (eggshells)
I delivered the wedding rings today and the couple loved them! I was so glad. But there was a problem - one ring was slightly too small so we came back to the house so I could re-size it. As I was hammering on it to make it larger it started to split - a very small crack at the edge. I quit pounding on it at that point - it was large enough for her to wear and use for the wedding ceremony - and I put a drop of fingernail polish on the split so it wouldn't catch on anything as a temporary solution. When they get back from Maui next month I will have a new ring ready for her and she can bring the cracked ring with her to the house so I can remove the diamond from it and put it in the new ring all in one afternoon. We talked about how I was planning to quit doing commissions - they just make me too nervous and they totally understood but said they were glad that they got in under the wire of me quitting. I showed them some of my pendants (which they thought were really wonderful) and I told them how much joy I get in making them - they are playful and unique and if something comes out different from my original plan I just change the design and make something else with it - the pieces can evolve - which is something I can't do with commissioned pieces. So I'm glad I have made that "a decision" now. No more commissions. I feel buoyant and relieved.

This afternoon we bought all the stuff for Johnny to make sushi and he planned to make it tonight but he and Alyson took a nap and overslept so the plan is now that we will have sushi for Easter dinner tomorrow along with ham loaf and cheesy scalloped potatoes and steamed broccoli. I think I will make a Waldorf salad too. It's shaping up to be a big meal.

A photo I took today - the light reflecting off the back side of the Axicon Rainbow Maker onto my dresser wall.

Going to fill Easter eggs with candy and money now for the hunt tomorrow...
summersgate: (I R = infrared)
spruce curtain

Gabe and I walked down to the creek tonight. I wanted to take some new infrared photos but this time when processing them I wanted to switch the hues 180 degrees. The sky when it is straight from the infrared camera is brown for some reason so I wanted to see if I switched the whole color scheme of the pictures if I could get a blue sky again. I think I like a brown color in the plants better than a brown sky - though that was interesting too.

6 more HERE )

Had a busy day today - the grandkids have started their Easter vacation so they were home all day. Gabe hung with me and we walked this morning with Berdella at Lake Wilhelm while Sebby and Rossy went with Dave and went fishing. On the way home from Wilhelm Gabe and I shopped at Kmart for plastic Easter eggs (going to have an egg hunt on Sunday - I like to put money in the eggs) and dining room chair cushions. When we got home I was tired and I took a nap, then got up after an hour and worked on the wedding rings. The construction of them is now finished, though I still need to do a final filing, sanding, oxidation, pre-polish, stone setting, and final polish.


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